It has been a little more than a month since the passing of my father. And, I knew that Christmas time was going to be tough, and here we are. As I write this, it is Christmas Eve, and the photo above was taken one year ago, on our last Christmas together as a family.
As I have said before, I do not pretend to have all the answers when it comes to the grieving process, I guess I’m utilizing this blog as my was as self-expression, a way to check in with all of you, and to share my process.
For us as a family, Christmas Eve was really the holiday for us. Our family traditions are solid. Back in the day, we went to Midnight Mass, but as the years have gone on, we ended up going to an afternoon or evening service. Our family would always opt for opening gifts on Christmas Eve, as opposed to Christmas Day. And, in the recent past, I’ve taken to recording video to remember these nights. I was going to post some Christmas Eve videos, but it was just too emotionally difficult to do that tonight. Maybe next Christmas.
They say that holidays are tough following the passing of a loved one, and the first holidays, birthdays, and other events, are especially challenging. I guess for this Christmas, it has not really hit me until right now. And, while I feel tremendously sad, I know that I have all these Christmas Eve memories that I can call on to bring that smile to my face, to still remember the good times. Miss you Dad….