I'm still in kind of a weird blogging place right now, so bear with me. The self-reflective posts continue (at least for now). I've been feeling like this since I've gotten back.

It's hard to describe where I'm at with things in general right now. I can't quite put into words, but I'll try. I just completed a long fourteen month project which culminated in last week's meeting.

I was on the planning committee, and I had a lot invested in this project - especially from an emotional standpoint. From a professional standpoint, I was kind of putting myself out there on a limb, since I was one of the key contacts/presenters for the meeting.

Being the "go-to" person on site has its ups and downs. While I got most of the complaints from the people that attended, I also received some compliments. I'm a detailed oriented person (imagine that), and there were nights where I couldn't sleep trying to anticipate all the problems of the next day.

When all was said and done, at the end of the last day, I did feel relieved that the entire thing was over. There were no disasters that occurred (at least from what I heard), and for the most part, people got a lot out of the meeting.

Now, I'm not perfect, and I believe I made some mistakes - or, at least, I felt that some things could have been done better. But, at some point during the meeting, I had to surrender and let go of the things that I could not control. I said my serenity prayer, and moved on.

Even when I attend meetings that I do not plan (just an attendee), I go through this "post-conference" let down. And, I guess that's where I'm at this week. Physically and emotionally, I feel drained - even to the point of not blogging how I usually do.

This week really has made me reflect a little bit. Being focused on the day-to-day tasks here at home really has made me forget about just letting my mind go free sometimes - and think about - just about anything. Is life really about completing tasks until you're too tired to stay awake? Probably not.

I begin a new fourteen month project next week. I will give it all of my heart and soul, as I do with all of the projects that I strongly believe in. I'll make my to-do lists and complete the tasks one by one until all of them are completed next summer.

Hopefully, I'll have more weeks like this where I'm not so focused - and maybe a little bit random and scattered. Changing the routine every once in a while is good for the body, mind, and spirit. I really believe that....